Since my daughter's father passed I have been in a state of depression that I cannot get out of. I cannot keep my mind on school work or the kids. The kids need me, especially the foster boys, of whom we have gained custody of for the rest of their childhood. They need me because they have been neglected by their parents, my daughters need me so they don't feel shoved out of the picture, Hailey needs me because her daddy died, and my school work needs my attention.
I, as a student, have always been proud of my work. I was a mother of only two and still maintained a GPA of 3.8 or higher. I was recognized by the University of Fairbanks and I got asked to join the National Society of Collegiate Scholars as well as the Golden Award "something" because of my accomplishments. Now, I feel as if I am going to lose is all because of a few setbacks. I was proud of myself and now I don't know.
All I can do is try and do what is humanly possible within me. All I can do is ask God for strength to make it through today and hope that tomorrow is better.
Thanks for reading. Sorry it was depressing, but I admit I feel better now that I got that off my chest.
Jessica
3 comments:
One of the nice things about blogs is that you're supposed to use them to vent every now and then. It's healthy to do that, especially in a group that is as supportive and concerned as this class seems to be. The intern year is difficult by any standards, and you seem to have many additional hardships piled on. But--you'll get through this, for all of the reasons that got you recognized at UAF before. We're all here for you.
I am impressed that you are still in school even when you have so much on your shoulders. I would have probly dropped school for a while trying to get my family back together. If you need any help I will do what I can! I would not unknow what to do without out my husband, I feel for you.
Jessica,,
I am so sorry to hear of your struggles. I can't imagine what you must be going through. I hope that things get brighter for you. I know it is hard. Please know that I will be thinking positive thoughts for you that you would be able to make it through such a difficult time.
Melissa
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